CFAC – Corporate Communications

Tenure : 4 months

 

I went to the dingy building (a bit further from Dharmatala’s KC Das)  – match box sized offices (imagine from The Park deluxe – spacious office premises – I suddenly came back to where I had started from : Trend India Mktg. kind of Office !There was another guy standing in front of the closed room – the room number I was to report to !

His name was Partha Majumdar. We started to chat and found out that both of us belonged to the Defence background and thus are KV (Kendriya Vidyalaya) products ! This much is enough for us to gel well.

After 15 -20 mins or so, a short, maybe 5’3” height middle aged, curly haired man walked in and opened the lock of the door – we both were looking his way. He then called us in – ‘Yes !Caam (‘come’ in Bengali accent) in !’ – he said looking our way. His name was Mr. Srijib Das.The room was smaller than a match box also – there were 2 dirty computers lying in a row and a small cubicle where he sat – dust smitten , papers everywhere table.

He started with saying that this is not the office where the classes will take place but its in Salt Lake , Sector V – actually that was what was written in the Newspaper Advertisement and I wanted to work/ stay near Salt lake premises since it was closer to my house – I did’nt want to spend half of my life in buses and trams and trains and autos and taxis  !

We three got chatting and he showed big plans for his company in near future – we both were very impressed I must say! He then said that he was from some Vivekananda Vidya Pith somewhere in Howrah and that he possess an original Vivekananda photograph with him. Later he even showed me the same !

Anyways we reached CFAC building – a Godforsaken place at that point of time at least – hardly any bus or auto went that way – so the first thing I told him was that its too much inside – if someone kidnaps me and kills me – no one will ever find it out !!To this he had said that with time I will get habituated with the premises and till that time he can give us a taxi lift. We agreed – Partha and me – I later found out that I will be the student and Partha will be the Teacher !

So I was the only student for quite some time – then 2-3 more students also joined in- Sathi a girl joined whose residence was in Dhanbad or somewhere there and she was staying with her Aunty – 2 more faculties joined in – imagine the scenario – 4 students and 3 faculties …I used to see him counseling – how he blatantly lied gosh! – he used to say things like we are tied up with the forthcoming Robotics society etc. – just because he knew some one from that sector and he also promised Placement Guarantee to anyone and everyone who walked in ! Suddenly one fine day he started counseling people that Y2K problem solving will be taught here ! I wondered how he could get away with so much lies !!

He then even told us that he was jailed once because of forgery !! Goodness gracious me ! On hearing this I almost fell from the sky – but it was already too late – I had already given Rs.11,000/- for the course and not only that – I had even counseled my sister to join this sector since she was very keen on drawing and fashion designing kind of stuff. Since Dad was sponsoring for both of us – he had already invested Rs. 22,000/- for both of us. Now if I had gone & told him of this episode of jail and forgery – hell might have broken loose since my father always insisted on taking proper feedback and enough knowledge about any place before investing !

Then the house which we had taken up – some Mr. Nathany- to whom the CFAC building belonged – arranged for the inauguration of the Centre by Mr. Murli Manohar Joshi – who was a close acquaintance of his.

So we all got busy in the inauguration ceremony .

 

Mr. Murli Manohar Joshi’s Speech on Science & Robotics

 

Frankly speaking folks, I had no inkling regarding the Political scenario of India – I never had any desire to go through the Newspapers – the only thing I saw was the cartoon Strip.

So keeping the above on mind – you all can well understand whatever little idea I had about  the politicians of the country was based on the Hindi movies! – Now hindi movies have been showing since my early childhood – that Politicians are hindi speaking, illiterate, paan (beetle leaf) chewing, un-smart & uncouth kind of an entity who have done nothing on earth but taken bribes !!….who the hero kills eventually etc.

So I was literally wondering what can such a personality speak on Science & Robotics !So I took a back seat to watch the fun.

Mr. Joshi started to speak – impeccable English !very crisp, very up to the point – never once did he divert from the topic – spoke for one full hour on that ‘one topic’ and I listened – SPELL BOUND !! open – mouthed-ly !!

I usually fall asleep during lectures – and if its long, I do not even bother to sit through it !But I was wide awake – much to my surprise – and man I was impressed !!

Later I went home and told my sister and brother-in-law (BIL) about this incident and my BIL said – well he has been a  Professor of Physics in some University for years so this kind of subject should not be any problem for him !! anyways it certainly was an eye-opener for me – and I relaxed a bit more thinking that we are in the hands of literates after all and the scenario is not all that bad as exaggerated in the hindi films !!

 

I accepted the job of a Counselor for Rs. 3000/- per month.

 

Mr. Srijib Das knew of my experience and was developing a kind of attraction for me – I could understand it but I never paid any heed to it – he was no where near my expectation and moreover Somu dear was still my priority (ref. My love locha in Autobiography section) !

I could sense that he had developed this weakness for me – he usually gave me Taxi lift till my bus stop then leave Sathi till her stop Chingrighata – so he was spending money like water – like a fool basically !

Sathi had a sad past – ie. After having gone around with a guy for 4-5 years – he had shifted to Delhi and Delhi changed him immensely – he had visited her after his Delhi trip and had told her about the fast life of Wife – swapping among the colleagues and bosses !! He expected her to do so as well and if she had problems then they could part ways !!!

This had come as a rude shock to Sathi and therefore she had come to Kolkata for a change and carry on with life. Now this Srijib fellow was very idealistic , philosophical kind of a person – they often used to discuss Bengali Sahitya (literature) and exchange stories written by different Bengali writers and be very comfortable in each other’s company. But the fool that this fellow was – he thought of me as an ideal partner – I had insulted him in so many occasions – even called him names in front of others but he still had the hope that one day I will – like a typical Bengali movie mushy & dumb heroine – give in and we will live happily ever after !

Men are such fools – he could not even speak a proper sentence in English and he thought of me as his ideal partner !! Whereas I would discuss Authors like Richard Bach and Khalil Gibran and Linda Goodman – he had this Rabindranath and Sarat Chandra kind of authors on mind – well nothing wrong in that but then he was not at all my kind  – and I had told this to him categorically several times – but fools never listen they say !!

 

An ardent admirer turns into an ardent  hater – The Mahanayak of Bengal !

 

Mr. Srijib Das  once told us that he was a great admirer of the mahanayak of Kolkata – Uttam Kumar – and that he used to cut any snap of his available in any godammed Magazine TILL ONE DAY …he read that after the failed love affair with the already married to a drunkard brute – Suchitra Sen – he started to live – together with her (suchitra’s ) look alike Supriya.

This lady Supriya had moved in with her 5 years old daughter. BUT time came when the 5 years old daughter turned into a 16 years old youthful budding rage – so Uttam’s love or lust shifted from Supriya (now old & haggard) to her blossoming daughter of 16 years old !!

Having read this Srijib had burnt down the album that he was maintaining with Mahanayak’s photos ! How silly these Bengali loser men are I thought !! Here I have heard men masturbate just by viewing a semi nude picture of a woman in a magazine and there in the movie sets – available sluts are dying to get ‘laid’ – this is known to everyone and anyone all over the world !! How come it was a rude shock for Srijib is really amazing !

While at Hostel, he was invited by seniors for a <beep> session !

When Mr Srijib Das was younger – he claimed that he was very fair, chubby and good looking ! Because of this aspect of his – often the senior section students invited him to their rooms – but he always denied !!

I asked exactly why was he invited – well he just shrugged his shoulder and said “God knows ! – I never went”.

So ! any guesses why was he invited folks?

 

Opening of DSQ office in the same premises

 

Mr. Nathany , the Land Lord of CFAC gave a part of his building to this huge enterprise DSQ. Now these people were really rich and were a huge Organisation – within a week or so the entire scenario changed of the same building with many men – corporate, young and smarter MCA’s etc coming to work there.

They installed the latest Computers and the networking was done within a few days and we all ‘puny fish’ used to look at them with awe. This Srijib could not stand and used to say that very soon he’ll have an office like that! By that time we all had come to know that he can only talk big but has zero stamina – just a balloon flying high !

So one day , the pally kind of a Lady that I am, I befriended of one the DSQ-ite and asked him to show me around his office – well – men are very courteous beings – so he took me inside and showed me the huge set up – I wished I could work in such a good looking, big Corporate office but then I had no knowledge of SAP so there was no chance for me !

In the mean time Srijib, I believe was looking for me and he came in and started screaming at the top of his voice as if I was a very small 5 years old girl who has gone out of her home with informing ! The DSQ fellows were shocked beyond description – they were wondering how anyone could scream like that in office. Later Srijib told me that because he could not find me for a long time he thought I was probably murdered and he’ll only find my dead body in the back yard ! I somehow stood that insult thinking that it was sheer fear that made him behave in such an atrocious manner in front of others !

Anyways the fact that he was jealous of the smart , good looking, degree holder Corporate fellows upstairs was only too evident ! The fool thought that I’ll probably run away / elope with one of them ! After all he as heavily under the ill-effect of mushy Bengali movies where it is often shown that heroines are confused dull-headed Idiots who only think of eloping with anyone who catches their fancy and ofcourse who possess a good bank balance.

 

I told him about Somnath.

 

To ward him off—I told him about Somnath. I told him the entire story and said that I am no longer in touch with him – which was true. After hearing me out – he had mentioned that my brother was pretty liberal – if he had been my brother, he would have had him shot !!

Well that was June 1998. My cousin brother Partha who lives just beside our house – knew everything about Somnath. He was never in favour of this Love but then he never said anything to me in this regard – also because he is younger to me. I told him once that how is he (Somnath) and that does he enquire about me or not. Partha jokingly said – give me your office number – I’ll hand it over to him so that he can talk to you! I gave him the number but never thought that he will ever call me ! Once while I was at Salora – I had called his (Somnath’s) Mashi’s residence and he’d blasted me left-right & centre ! He had screamed at me and said that time is not right for us to talk – and had slammed the phone down !!

After this blast from him – gosh! I had never been blasted by any man in my life !! – I never dared to call him up or even find out about him. I used to counsel myself think : Ours is not a puny mortal love but that a high kind of Spiritual Love – so we needn’t meet or even talk as its not really required. Just the thought that the Incarnation of this Era had accepted me was a big deal for me !

Well , back to 1998, CFAC – I was speaking to Mr. Das when suddenly the phone rang and Mr. Das handed over the phone to me. HE had called up. Somnath had actually called up after some 6 years !! – you all can understand how my facial expression changed – I was smiling – beet – root red face and ears (thanks to Adrenal Glands) – he just inquired how I was and that whether I remember him or not !

I blushed and said – of course I do – I had been waiting to hear HIS voice for the last 6 years.

Mr. Das was quietly watching my reactions – he asked me whose call was it – and instead of lying (I am a very bad liar anyways) I blurted out – Gosh ! its HIM !! – you indeed are lucky for me Mr. Das  –  after 6 long years HE thought of me !!and he actually rang me up !

This came to him as a rather rude shock – since he thought that : I have been made for him – and had plans to ‘live together happily ever after with me !! (what a foolish thought – but I suppose after hearing Somnath’s profile, origin, educational background, zero bank balance – Mr. Das had acquired a kind of confidence that if a girl like me could go for such a profile – she will definitely go for an educated man that he was !! – you see folks – no one is ready to believe that – in my opinion (my dreams and visions)  He is RAMAKRISHNA’s reincarnation ! – otherwise why on earth would I go for an uneducated, only Bengali speaking, not even good looking , financially poor fellow ?! WHY? – definitely not for sex!! – I mean ….come on – in that case I would have married long time ago to any good looking Army Bachelor, Engineer – etc. whose proposal had come my way !! – well..well..well – this world and its inhabitants are rather foolish!

This villain Mr. Das rang up my parents and reported !!

But GOD, as usual , was on my side – see how he saved me …

My cousin Partho (living right beside my house), who knew all about it, had an accident because of which, he had severely sprained his ankle – due to which he was just sitting at home – getting ‘sprained ankle treatment’ done at home by immersing his feet in hot – cold water alternatively.

It so happened, that while he was taking his daily treatment, he was sitting in his bedroom – which directly faces our Drawing room. My father picked up the phone (Mr. Das’s phone) – as his usual Military voice – kind of screamed at the phone – and called out his name – SOMNATH ! that Kali temple priest ! My God – she is still in touch with him ! I cannot believe it !!…and then kept on listening to what Mr. Das had to say to him.

But till that time , Partho (my cousin) had heard what he had to hear !

That evening when I got down of the bus, I suddenly saw my cousin limping towards me with his bicycle – he said : what kind of a fool are you?!

I was surprised to see him at that time – limping and somehow managing to walk !!

He asked me whether I had told Mr. Das about Somnath – I said – well ofc ourse – he rang up after 6 years today – Mr. Das was right in front – so I could not hide from him.

Partho said : your parents have been informed .

Gosh! I fell from the sky – it was death news to me ! this time my brother was not there – to take me away from my parent’s wrath – and he would not even have taken me – because the earlier Bangalore stunt proved to be a void !!

Partho cooled me down – he asked me to say the following :

Tell your parents that in order to ward off  Mr. Srijib Das’s advances, you told him that you are still going on with him – so that he stops showing interest in you.

I said : will they be convinced by my lie?

Partho said : If you want to live, this is your only option.

I said : Okay !

At home – I usually make tea – so as usual I went to the Kitchen – and my mother followed – I knew beforehand why she came behind me – (believe me folks – If it had’nt been for my cousin Partho – I would’nt be writing this here !- I am a very poor liar – and I would have immediately faltered – if Somnath’s phone call’s news reaching my parents had come to me from my mother)

But by that time I had mentally rehearsed several times – and when my Mother asked – Are you still in touch with Somnath ? – I frowned – and said : What! – Somnath?!(as if I had heard the name for the very first time in my life !!) – why?

Mom told me the evening phone call incident.

I just laughed and said : that fool is interested in me – to ward him off I made up this story.

My mom was not really convinced – she said – you could have said that your to-be is in UK or US – why Madhyamgram Priest ?

To this I said – in that case he would have said – why does he never call you up etc. – and blah-blah – I said – I am a very poor liar – so I just let him be jealous of someone he can identify with !

She seemed convinced. I heaved a sigh of great relief. But then she said – Don’t work in this stupid Organisation then, Ask NIIT to give you a better placement. You needn’t continue here – neither as a student nor as a Counselor.

Well – that was a good idea. I didn’t like this daily stupidity of the typical Bengali loser fool ! I left CFAC.

 

Mr. Das tied the knot with Sathi

 

I used to get news bits occasionally about CFAC from yet another Partha – his name was Partho Majumdar. He used to tell me that Mr. Das has hired a Contessar car and behaves as if it were his own ! He sits behind with Sathi and they indulge in ‘sweet nothings’ sometimes even ‘hard somethings’ with the Driver sitting in the front ! (Only lower crass humans are capable of such shamelessness in presence of a 3rd person !)

One day my sister, who had also joined the same course, told me that she had gone visiting a Fair where she happened to see Mr. Das with Sathi and said that she was wearing a very expensive Boutique dress – probably bought by Mr. Das – as her dresses were not of such utterly (unnecessarily) high priced !…so she was kind of using him…and he was getting used! (Sweet dreams are made of these I suppose )

Later one day Sathi called me up and said she is tying the knot with her childhood friend whose name is Ramakrishna ! But her plans were thwarted by Mr. Das as he called up Sathi’s father and told him all about their ‘Car’ episodes etc. and said that his daughter better marry him or he will ruin her!

Well, I received an invitation card saying Sathi weds Srijib and on that card was also engraved the phrase : ‘aamra do-jon chalti dharae panthi” – which is from Rabindranath Tagore’s ‘Sesh`er kabita – a story in which the hero loved someone else but circumstances led him to tie the knot with someone else !! Just imagine what must have gone through Sathi’s heart – her wedding card clearly indicating that her ‘husband to be’ does not love her but is just marrying her – for the heck of it I suppose !! How these foolish Bengali men ruin their relationships I wonder –at least he got  the love of a girl – he should have shown respect to her love!!

Then Partha Majumdar told me that Sathi is not keeping well – she is always down with something or the other – first jaundice then something else. Last I heard – she filed for a divorce ! Amazing really!

 

Why I decided against marrying an engineer :

I met yet another fellow – an engineer – Basudev Acharya – he had taken up programming as Civil engineering was very strenuous – standing in the sun etc.

He showed me the snaps of his hostel life esp. ragging – males ragging males ie.

Boys had dressed up like females – had inserted tennis balls in place of breasts !! and gosh! What utterly disgusting postures they were – so very cheap ! I decided never to marry an engineer after viewing these snaps !!I was basically doing a ‘neti-neti’ with prospective grooms I think – maybe the higher realms thought it to be neti-neti as taught by great seers and maybe because of this reason I am in this spiritual world…who knows ….!!

Anyways, I would not have married— was just collecting reasons for not marrying men from this field or that field etc.You can visit my site other link here—under the ‘My Poems’ section , I have written a poem in 2 parts ‘ Kaise haan kar doon Dinanath ji’ – where I rejected the thought of marrying an MBA and an IAS officer.

 

World Wide Web:

(camac street – minto park crossing)

Tenure : 25 minutes.

 

While working at CFAC, when I saw that Mr. Das was getting on my nerves – I happened to get a call from a consultant – and went for an interview – very far – very far indeed – Minto park crossing – I got selected – it was headed by 2 young chaps – both had fathers who had money so they had gone abroad to study.

Their father had made for them a big office space in the heart of Kolkata – so now they had decided to open up a centre on Software Training with certification from Geneva.

The look of the office was good. They offered me Rs. 3000/- per month.They said that they will give me incentive but only after I complete one year of working with them (so very clever indeed ! – I’ll continue like an Indian Idiot Woman for one year with the greed that I will get my incentive after one year—this way of payment mode is referred to as ‘The carrot and stick incentive’ in the corporate world—run by the Corporate Giants—where Giants , in hindi ,are called Rakshsahs!! (eg. Of Rakshashs in Indian Mythology : Ravana, Putana etc.)

The first day I went there – the shorter looking one (forgotten his name ) asked me to go to other centers and find out how counseling is done – he also asked me to appear genuine and even buy the brochure – the payment of which will be adjusted with the salary ! – he was talking like a ‘punjab di khet ka jhahil ganwaar’ – a villager from a remote Punjab villager – uncouth, uncultured, smoking and sitting leisurely on the table! He asked the secretary – a very young girl, to bring the dustbin towards him in such a manner as if she was his maid servant !! – and she obediently listened to him as well ! he wanted to throw the ash in it !!

Anyways his attitude was too much – he mentioned : you should take just a couple of hours for doing what you are told.

By that time I had already lost my cool viewing his mannerisms an attitudes. I went home straight and rang up the secretary and told her that I will not work for such a sick organization.

I then told the Consultant that he behaved with me like as if I were an Alsation puppy just been bought – and who is being trained by the master !!

I saw them once or twice in Career Fair in Ice Skating rink – but later they were never seen again !…with that kind of an attitude – no one can rule for long – esp. in a place like Kolkata !

 

Yet another Dream / Vision that came true :

 

I sat at home for about 4-5 months—getting utterly depressed.I utilized my time making dresses and woolens for Gods—esp. Laddo Gopal (Infant Krishna) – as one of my Vaishnav friends had suggested me to look after Him as your own child. We have many idols at home so I used to decorate them very beautifully.

One night , I felt someone of very  tiny stature—a Lady—sat near my head and asked me in a shrill voice (I was semi awake—not asleep—it was , as if really happening to me) –

She asked : Do you want to know something?

I said: When will my progress start.

She said: 21st Wednesday.—then everything was silent.

I woke up and referred to the calendar—and found that a 21st falling on Wednesday—was November—1998.

Well , we started renovating our house and 21st November came. And the phone rang. And the call was from NIIT Placement Cell. I was called by some Placement Executive—Raja—and the next day I had to meet him.

I met Raja—and he gave me two options: either Daewoo or HCL. I said HCL—and I even knew I’ll get the job there—because of yet another dream as follows :

I had this dream that I am entering an office with HCL written hugely with metal—steel. And guess what ?It actually was written exactly that way !!

 

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